Back to Abnormal


Welcome to Oscar’s Tavern!

How is everyone today?  Good I hope.  I’m a little tired, but ok.  Charlene, god bless her pretty lil’ heart has been here to help me with my little problems and I’m getting better. Thanks to those who cared!   Love is a funny thing.

So let’s get on the bike and pedal forward.. (OK I have training wheels on today still)

You mean you’re still drunk


Yeah, a Huffy bike with Dewars training wheels….  LOL

Ok, so we helped each other.


Charlene and I have  relationship problems  

Oh sure bring my life to the bar….LOL   Everyone will leave…

Tell them whats for today..

Oh, well we have Chicken Murphy, cooked all the Murphy while I was listening to you all night Mr. Oscar….   Drowning himself in , oh yes, Merlot.

(Oscar takes a bar rag and playfully slaps Charlene on the butt, she sprays him with coke from the dispenser….)

HEY!!!   (laughing)  STOP!!!

TWO Barrels, Cowboy!!!! (laughing)

(Charlene takes the seltzer water nozzle and fights back with both… the floor is a mess… Willy walks in…

What the Sam Hill is going on here!?!?!?

Oscar grabs the sink hose and sprays Willy, Charlene makes him a “coke soda”.

What the hell is wrong with you too!

 Charlene and Oscar just stand there and laugh like hell. Charlene slides to the floor, Oscar squats down next to her. The two sad drunks hug with tears in thier eyes.  All is quiet.

You guys are fu#&ed up. Stop drinkin’ we open soon.

Damned kids.

Clean this Go# da&# mess up.  Get a room!


Click HERE.




So….  um….    

Come on in and enjoy a nice dish of Charlene’s Chicken murphy!  And a nice glass of merlot.

You regulars, the drinks are on me.  (Willy says)

Joe was talking to his buddy at the bar, and he said, “I don’t know what to get my wife for her birthday – she has everything, and besides, she can afford to buy anything she wants, so I’m stumped.”

His buddy said, “I have an idea – why don’t you make up a certificate saying she can have 60 minutes of great sex, any way she wants it – she’ll probably be thrilled.”

So the that’s what Joe did.

The next day at the bar his buddy said, “Well? Did you take my suggestion?”

“Yes, I did,” said Joe.

“Did she like it?” His buddy asked.

“Oh yes! she jumped up , thanked me, kissed me on the forehead and ran out the door, yelling “I’ll be back in an hour!!”

I have a mess to clean…..


(yes, you too Ms. Tavern Queen…. >slap, >splash<…..)







~ by Oscar on September 10, 2009.

7 Responses to “Back to Abnormal”

  1. I’m glad you are back to the regular…sorry to hear about Charlene and you. Drink it up!

  2. I don’t expect you two will ever behave yourselves. Go get shitfaced and have sloppy sex. That’ll cure what ails the both of ya.

  3. Are the drinks really on you, or just all over you? LOL Even though Willy got a little miffed, I thought you and Charlene were funny. I hope the hangovers aren’t too bad. I’m starving, so just dish up some of Charlene’s Chicken Murphy, will you? Never mind the Merlot, I think I’ll try that mango margarita my girlfriend was talking about. Snoopy’s still blue, you too?

  4. I hope that hangover is short lived.

  5. “I’ll be back in an hour!” Ooohh. That’s a funny one! 🙂

  6. Chicken Murphy is really one of my all time favorite meals!

  7. I’m glad you have Charlene. She sounds like a great friend. Did you save any of that Merlot for me? I could use some!

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