Welcome to Oscar’s Tavern!

How are you today?  It’s me, slacker Oscar.  I have been like Johnny Carson at the tail of his career, not hosting as much. Sorry about that. I’ve been busy as hell between the tavern here and life.  Gets that way doesn’t it sometimes…  I’m sure you can relate. And on top of that I need to “benchmark” a couple times before the holidays. Next week I’m in PR again. Maybe Chicago and Minneapolis before Christmas.

Good thing I have capable hands to leave this fine establishment in.

The lovely and delicious Charlene…(she’s looking at me funny) has California Cheeseburgers on the menu today, with a favorite of hers Jim Beam Red Stag.    We’ll all be fed and a little tipsy.  That stuff packs a punch!

Well it seems the Holiday Season is under way!  Our friend Meleah started it off with THIS.

And Thisnewplace has a cute offering too!

Remember Sally?  She came in last year and worked the holidays with us??  Well she’ll be back. Willy is going to go to Florida for the holidays. He bought a place in Sarasota.  So to fill in for him, Sally will tend. NO – No one can fill Willy’s shoes.  But she will be a big help.  Her and Vinnie have been a couple  almost a year now. Thats nice.

So can you figure this Tiger Woods thing out?  Wow, how about that!!   Willy and I agree that he has to be nuts.  His wife is super-hot.   Whats wrong with this guy!!!??!  Show’s to go ya people get nutty when they have a lot of money!   She has a free drink here anytime, right boys!!! 

RIGHT!

We’d just let her have all the drinks she wanted and maybe even demonstrate our grip!   LOL   Show her how even us bogey golfers are good guys.

New Nike “TW” hat……..$25 New Nike Golf Shoes……$125 New Cadillac Escalade….$60,000 New Nike Iron, wrapped around your head by jealous wife?  PRICELESS!!!!

Tiger Woods told his girlfriends today how lucky he was after what happened last friday . ” I’m so glad Elin only bashed my face in with that club  ’cause she was aiming at my balls ! ”  

Hear about the new Movie?    Crouching Tiger, Hidden Hydrant!

Oh well, he’ll pull through this ok. He still can golf.   Its sad to see such a role model for some become tarnished. Well maybe its time I worked on my game… hit the links with Willy in Florida…. Hmmmmmm.

There are some of Heathers deviled eggs left in the fridge… I’m grabbin them while Charlene is in the back room.   heh heh heh.

“OH…um  Hey honey….”   Let’s have some of them eggs, we’ll split ‘em.

“Thats right..”

Have a great day!

Ciao.

Welcome to Oscar’s Tavern.

Oscar is out today. Said he wasn’t coming in today.  Something was bugging him he said.  Oh well.. He said he’d be in tomorrow.

Eric here.  Mr. Oscar said I can write the post today.  Everybody is sick of Turkey so I asked Charlene what was on the menu and she said “Stuffed Cabbage”.  I said >ew<.  She said it was one of Oscar’s favorite dishes and he’s not here.  Todays drink is Captain and Coke in honor of Itsjustme.

Well we had a nice Turkey Day at my house. My mom made a nice turkey and we had some people over. Mr. Oscar came by for a few minutes, had a drink and left.  Mom said he was busy.  He brought wine and drink stuff.  Like a Santa Clause for Thanksgiving.  Ho ho ho merry drunk-mas. My aunt said we already had enough stuff to drink and didn’t need his booze.  She says everyone is a frikkin alcoholic.  I can’t drink because I’m not old enough.  And who wants to drink a Bloody Mary, >ew<  or a screwdriver….>ew<   My older sister likes fuzzy navels…  I don’t think there’s much room in those things to drink much from. >ew< and hair…

My aunt says my moms stuffing tastes like Stove Top.  I know she made it from scratch because I helped her put it in the pan.  We put plastic wrap on the baking tray and someone covered it with foil and cooked it.  So when we took it out the top was all yucky.  Some people scraped it off and at it. Uncle Willy said whoever ate it will have poop with no smell ’cause its wrapped.  >ew<

My mom asked me to say grace.  I asked, what about her..what happened?

 Everybody enjoyed the dinner even our dog.  He was licking the Jello mold before mom put it on the table.  it was green.  >ew<

My cousin farted at the table.  My aunt got all mad and stuff.  Uncle Willy said it was the turkey.   >ew<

Aunt Judy fell asleep on the couch during the football game.  We put a santa hat on her and a turkey bone in her hand and took a picture. Uncle Willy said she looked beautiful as ever…

My cousin from Florida called and was in North Carolina.  They said it was too cold. 

If you bowl on Thanksgiving, and you miss, is it  butter-ball?  ha ha  That was Mr. Oscar’s joke.

The Tavern was closed on Thanksgiving.  Nobody wanted to work the day after.  I went in with my mom and worked with Mr. Oscar. It wasn’t busy till the afternoon.  A lot of crazy shoppers stopped by on thier way home.  I asked a woman what she bought and she said “Wii”.   I said are you French?

My bus is coming soon. Mom is calling … Hope you had a nice Thanksgiving and thanked everyone who thanked you.  I’m thankful Christmas is coming and my mom gets to work extra hours because Mr. Oscar said some people are leaving the Tavern.

I think I like Charlenes neice… she kissed me behind the bar on Friday.   >ew<

Chicken CIAO Mein!

Here’s a Snoopy

>ew<  did you see the big boobies on the lady under here?  >ew<  Someone said thats one of Oscars old girlfriends.  Uncle Willy says “need a lot o’ gravy for that meat”.

Welcome to Oscar’s Tavern!

How are you?  Sit down, what can I get you?

No real specials today as far as drinks. I just put some popular drinks on the board we get a lot of requests for!  So let me know what you’d like and we’ll put one in front of you!

Well we sure aren’t going to have Turkey today as most of you will have plenty tomorrow. So I said to myself, “Whats the opposite of Turkey?”   

After a few minutes, and an early drink… I came up with nothing…  

Then after speaking with a friend I decided….Eggs.    So today we are having Pepper and egg sandwiches.  Or as we say in fun…”sangwiches”.   Willy’s family is italian. When they say sandwiches, they say “sangwiches”.   LOL

So are you ready for your Thanksgiving?   It’s my favorite holiday – No obligations. Just togetherness and thanks.    Nice….

We decided to close the Tavern for Thanksgiving so all of our staff can anjoy the day with friends and family. 

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn’t find one fresh enough for her family. She asked the stock boy. “Don’t you have fresh turkeys?” The stock boy answered, “But they are all dead. Now how can I make them take a bath?”

What did the mama turkey say to her naughty son?
If your papa could see you now, he’d turn over in his gravy!

Asked to write a composition entitled, “What I’m thankful for on Thanksgiving,”
little Timothy wrote, “I am thankful that I’m not a turkey.”

Have you finished off the first one?
Yeah!
Eaten it too?
Yeah!
What happened to the other one?
The other turkey is now reading our conversation, boss.

If a man wants to eat a turkey on Thanksgiving, what does a turkey want?
Ans- It simply wants to run away.

What did the turkeys sing on Thanksgiving Day?
Ans- God save the kin.

What did the turkey say to the man who tried to shoot it?
Ans- Liberty, Equality and Bad aim for all.

What will a turkey with a dramatic bent of mind say to another turkey on Thanksgiving morning?
Ans- To be or not to be roasted, that is the question.

Well have a Happy Thanksgiving.  Stay out of the Stores on Friday – Save a life.

Happy Thanksgiving Sweetie.

Ciao   (gobble)

NEWS FLASH!   WILLY HAS BEEN FOUND!

Welcome to Oscar’s Tavern!

How are you today?  Sit down!  What can I get you?

The lovely and talented Charlene tells me we have Sloppy Joe sandwiches on the menu today!  a side of “tater tots”  (is gonna be a good day Tater) 

We’re happy here today so all draft beers are a buck fifty!

So we found our fine bartending mentor. He’s down at Cow Wreck beach!  The Missus and him had a vacation planned. It fell directly when I was out, during the ladies take over of the bar… He did leave a bit early. A huge Yankee fan. (his plans for his burial are to be cremated and placed in a Yankees Urn.)  So he wasn’t staying for the Phillies celebration.  He says “HAH!! ” anyway.  He’s been through the “ladies nights”.  LOL  So stupid Oscar forgets he’s scheduled to go out, no phone….  there.   and for you clue seekers, there’s a familiar picture in that link…

  This was too funny to censor…..

  Well there ya go.  All the worlds problems solved..  Well in regard to Willy. 

Gosh, This month is half over already!  I guess I have to get Charlene to coordinate the seasonal festivities soon!

By the way, we just went over 20,000 hits! or as we say here, drinks served….

I can hear Willy grumbling again… Ain’t it great!

Well have a great day.

Ciao!

Welcome to Oscar’s Tavern!

We can’t find Willy.   Charlene checked his house.  No sign of him or the Missus.  We’re getting upset.  Have any of you out seen or heard from him?  If you do, let us know. It’s not the same around here….

Hoo boy we’re all bummed out. I haven’t seen him since October 28th! Charlene and Leo said he was last here when the girls took over the Tavern….Hmmm.

Well Charlene and I aren’t in the mood for food today. So stop over at Sally’s cafe down the block before you come by.  All draft beers are a buck fifty today. So come on down and knock a couple down with Charlene and me.

My birthday was on Halloween. (yeah go ahead)  Charlene got me this card that shows a shot of booze on the cover. You open it and it says,” Cake is for Wussies”.    Gotta love her.

A guy walks into a bar with a dog. He claims the dog can talk. “Give me a beer and I’ll show you.” The bartender slides a beer to him and the man asks the dog, “Fido, what is that above our heads?” The dog says, “Roof!” The irritated bartender says, “That’s not talking, he sounds like any other dog.” The man says, “OK, how about this – Fido, who was the best baseball player of all time?” The dog says, “Ruth!” The bartender throws the man and the dog out of the bar. Fido says to the man, “Ya think I shouldda said DiMaggio?”

A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Do you want to play a game? See those two rib-eyes nailed to the ceiling? You get to throw one dart. If you hit one, you get to take them home and I’ll give you a free drink.” The man says, “No thanks, the steaks are too high.”

Hey its one of our favorite part time bartenders birthday today. Go wish her Happy Birthday!

Ciao!

Welcome to Oscar’s Tavern!

Whew!  It’s been a while hasn’t it?!    I got in yesterday and came by late last night to help Charlene close out. Willy wasn’t here.  Where the hell is he?

Well lets get the business out of the way. Today we have Meatball parmasan sandwiches from the grill and todays drink is Smithwicks Ale.  May as well have my favorite upon my return.

Well I had a good time relaxing in Florida.  I “benchmarked” a lot of fine establishments!   Got some ideas for this old place and am contemplating opening up “Oscar’s South”.   Lot’s of opportunity there. Already lined up a bartender. We’ll see.  Wanted to get down to visit Sandy, but time ran out. Next time my friend!  

Well it seems the mice:  TerriTerri, The Girl and Suprisedmom had a good time tending to the place.  Ok Terri, there was no little bimbo in the martini glass today.  I will try to be more… open?  But I like that little “Lady” in the glass.  I certainly could do worse.   LOL   and certainly not putting what You did.   LOL   Thanks for the Post and your perspective.  Actually thats what I would have expected from The Girl.  Surprises everywhere lately. 

Now as for The Girl…….    Hmmmmm.    What can I say. Gotta admire her team spirit. Oh did I mention “Losing team” spirit?  Ok I won’t,  I’ll be kind.    Still sweeping up red confetti and sparkles…  Now about that dinner…  I’ll be kind.  Something simple and fun will work. maybe one of them “Dangerland” Cheesteaks and a couple of brews. Thanks for the Post!  

And Suprisedmom!   Look at you!  LOL  You all must have planned this.  “Ladies Night Out”?    Male models…. and whats this Barely there stuff?   Hmmmmm.   Maybe its good you admitted you couldn’t paste pictures in there!  LOL  BTW – I’ll show ya how.   “Venting thier outrageous side”.    Yikes!     Thanks for the Post!

So the bar became a male strip show and a Phillies convention…..     Hmmmm.    What’s next?  Thanks to my friends and thier fun guest posts!    

Now where the hell is Willy?  Oh By the way, Charlene took this picture of Lisa….

You guys must have had one hell of a time!

A girl and her boyfriend go to the pub. When it’s the girl’s turn to buy around, she tells him that
she’s heard of a wonderful new drink he simply must try.

She returns with the usual half of lager for herself. For him, she has two glasses.
One contains a measure of Bailey’s, the other lime juice.

Instructions: “OK, what you gotta do is, you gotta swig the Bailey’s, hold it in your mouth,
and then drink the lime juice.” He looks a bit dubious, but she’s very enthusiastic so he decides to give it a go.

First the Bailey’s; lovely smooth, creamy, warm feeling in the mouth.
Then he takes the lime juice.

T + 0.1 secs: The cream in the Bailey’s curdles.

T + 0.3 secs: Boyfriend’s face turns the color of fresh lime juice.

T + 0.6 secs: Boyfriend calms his stomach and swallows the gunge.

T + 1.5 secs: She whispers in his ear….

“It’s called Blowjob oral sex revenge”

Well… see?  I can be a little daring!   and you pick on my “Tavern Girls”.   LOL

Well have a great day. It’s good to be back here with my friends in Blogland.

Where the hell is Willy?

Sweetie I’ve missed you….

Ciao

Today is a sad sad sad day for The Girl.   I had to watch Oscar’s team take the WS last night, and now I’m in the bar with my tail between my legs drinking away my sorrows.  

I now owe Oscar a dinner at the location of his choice.   And no honey, I don’t want to go to Hooters or Delilah’s Den.  And I promise I will mace any homeless people that come near you after dark.

Since my spirits are down and my team lost, we are having comfort food for lunch today !!!  Big ole greasy cheeseburgers with bacon and ranch dressing, curly cheese fries, and some Miller Lite to wash it down.  Anyone with the guts to wear a Phillies jersey in the establishment today will receive a free shot of Jack Daniels to help numb the pain of the broken heart.

I hope Oscar is enjoying his victory down there is sunny Florida.  I walked to work this morning with my teeth chattering.  I got an email from him earlier this week bragging about his tan.  I may have to beat him up a little after he returns and decides to get back to reality with the rest of us pee-ons of the working world.

Sorry I don’t have anything naughty for you.  I had Phillies pasties made and I special ordered a g-string for our victory party, but unfortunately I will not be able to wear them until next year.   But for your viewing pleasure I have included the painted on Jersey.  It will probably be the last Phillies item you see in the tavern for quite a while.

Hope everyone has a great upcoming weekend !   And despite our loss – I still heartily believe that the YANKEES SUCK.  But I do love my Oscar XXOO

Peace out Peeps:

The Girl

Hey everybody! It’s me – Terri. Since Oscar is on vacation in Florida (again!) he left me in charge of the bar today!

I don’t know about the rest of you, but I was getting kind of tired of looking at that little bimbo in the martini glass at the top of most of Oscar’s posts. I thought I’d bring in a little change of decor for the day. What do you think? This guy’s pretty cute, and he just so happens to drink one of my favorite beers.

I’m feeling a little chilly today, so I thought I’d put something on the menu that puts everyone in a vacation frame of mind. Oscar may be on a real beach vacation, but we can all go on a virtual vacation. We’re having Mexican today! Take your pick. There are burritos, chimichangas, tacos and plenty of tortilla chips with salsa and my special home-made guacamole.

Surprised Mom is mixing up margaritas and serving Coronas. Or if you prefer, The Girl and her friend (that’s him over there, to the right) will fix you up with a shot. They’ve got Naked Navels (Absolut and peach schnapps), G-Bombs (Absolut and Goldschlager) and something called (giggle) a Cum Scorcher… made with Absolut, butterscotch schnapps, Kahlua and Irish cream. Oscar said The Girl was a lot of fun. Now I know why! Hey, Girl! Have your friend pass me a Naked Navel, will ya?

Oh, yeah. Clearly, things are going to get a little rowdy in here tonight. Meleah’s going to run the karaoke machine tonight. She’ll do a great job of keeping the place lively. If I have enough shots, I’ll get her to sing Jose Cuervo with me! (Get your ear plugs out!)

And as much fun as it will be with me in charge, it’s just not the same around here without ya, Oscar! In your honor, I’m offering one more drink special, straight from my own hometown.

A Texan, A New Yorker and  New Jersey resident were drinking their favorite beverages in a bar.

The Texan drained his glass of tequila, threw the half-full bottle up in the air, drew and fired his pistol, shattering the bottle. The other two were shocked at his ruining perfectly good tequila.

The Texan, however, simply drew himself up and announced, “Where I come from, we have plenty of tequila.”

The New Yorker, not to be outdone, drained his glass of wine, threw the half-full wine bottle in the air, drew and fired his pistol, also shattering his bottle.

Looking over at the other two with an air of superiority characteristic of New Yorkers, he announced, “Where I come from, we have plenty of fine wine and the best of everything.”

The New Jersey resident drained his bottle of Yuengling Lager, threw it up in the air, drew his pistol, and shot the New Yorker dead. He then caught the bottle on the way down and showed it to the Texan. “Where I come from,” he said slowly, “we recycle bottles AND we have too many f*cking New Yorkers.”

Hurry back, Oscar! We miss ya!

Sorry all you sports fans at Oscar’s Tavern, but SurprisedMom is not into sports at all, and especially not East Coast sports teams. When I follow baseball, which is rarely, my heart belongs to a team that begins with a C and has four letters. That’s only because that’s the team that Grandpa followed. Otherwise, it’s just male adults running around a field in pajamas.

Today at Oscar’s Tavern I hope we have plenty of Miller Lite on tap, just because it’s my favorite.  We also need something warm to ward off the damp weather. How about chili? Maybe chili cheese dogs with cottage fries? It’s a filling meal.

As I sit behind the bar, I’m also trying to think of new fundraising ideas for the grade school my daughters attended. They are always looking for new and improved ideas to raise funds to keep the school open. I think I have it. Ladies Night Out with a twist.

You’ve heard of lingerie shows, even ones with the female models on the runway showing off the latest and sexiest fashions. Well . . .  how about MALE models debuting the latest and sexiest in men’s under fashions? Don’t you think women would come out and pay, maybe even big bucks, to see this? They can even feel good about themselves because all the money would go to a charity.

I would have it at Oscar’s Tavern of course. There would be gorgeous men, shimmering lights, soul grabbing music, screaming women, delicious food, exotic drinks and a heck of a good time for every woman who entered the door.

The beautiful men would be wearing what they wear next to their skin. I wonder if one would be up to wearing “Barely There.” Now that would be worth the ticket alone.

The decor would be glittery as well, in blue and white. Women could win prizes, with the top prize being a date with the model of her choice. The raffle tickets would be expensive and again the women could feel good about themselves because it’s all going to charity.

Women often look for a way to vent their outrageous side, especially women who might have tamed down with motherhood and age. I think this would be a great way to have a fantastically fun night out without feeling bad in the morning . . . unless they over indulged.

Of course, a bus would be rented to drive all the intoxicated guests home. The designated driver would be provided.

So, the challenge would be to transform Oscar’s Tavern into a large boudoir for the evening and show everyone a good time.

I think this would make a great FUN-raiser and I believe it could make a pretty buck as well.

One challenge would be coming up with a name. I mean you couldn’t call it a lingerie show. Men don’t wear lingerie, well some do, but that’s not the point.

Well, back to the present and serving Oscar’s customers. I can’t sit here daydreaming about gorgeous men in underwear all day.

Anyone want a Miller Lite?

(Sorry about the lack of graphics, but SMom couldn’t figure out how to add them. Yeah, sometimes my computer illiteracy shines through.)

Hey all you loyal Patrons of Oscar’s – most of you Yankee fans.  I’m a little late this morning because I had to go to Modell’s to get all the Phillies decorations for the bar today.   See Oscar is now shaking his head, probably muttering to himself “What was I thinking asking the Girl to watch the bar after the Phillies spanked us hard on a 6 to 1 win.   Can you say unbeLEEvable !!!!!!!!

Ummm, yes folks the Phillies – ya know us, the New York Post called us The Frillies !   We came in your town and bent you over and stuck it right up your blue asses !!!

In celebration we are having traditional Philly Cheesesteaks for Lunch and have what ever brew you want because it’s CELEBRATION TIME, THE PHILLIES TOOK GAME 1 – ha, in your face Yankee fans – and yes Oscar you will be treating me to Ruth Chris !  Ya know I have very expensive taste when it comes to my meals.  I’m thinking some surf and turf with Champagne to celebrate !

Today at the Tavern anyone wearing Phillies gear will be given half off their drinks until first pitch tonight.  Anyone found wearing a Yankee hat, shirt, or underware will be promptly yanked out the door.   We  have taken over the Tavern in Red Style.  The Phanatic will be stopping by later.  He’s a personal friend of mine. We are going to be burning Oscar’s hat that I stole from his closet last night.  He forgot it when he went to Florida – Ha ! Ha !

Adios Spankee Fans – Here’s to the Ass Kicking you took last night.

You all have an excellent Thirsty Thursday at the Tavern.

Forever My Love to Oscar :

Welcome to Oscar’s Tavern!

Well hello there!  Oscar here at your service!   Sit down!   Our drink special is Coors Light! And we have some delicious Burgers and Cheeseburgers ready to cook up for ya!   

What can I get YOU??

Oh!   A cheeseburger with tomato and lettuce?  Coming right up!  And a Coors Light?!  Yes! 

Well we here at the Tavern are happy the Yankees are in the World Series this year!   We have a tough opponent, The Phillies are gonna be a hard team to beat!   But we’re behind the guys and think we can do it!   I will be in Florida during the Series, taking a vacation!   Yes, traveling because I WANT TO, not because I have to.  Will visit the daughter and family.  We will all be in front of the TV for the games!  Looking forward to it!

Charlene was at the bar shown above over the weekend.  She says they tore the place up!  Check it out!  I love the whole theme, its great!  The Trailer Park Lounge. !  She always seems to find the real gems!   This is why we love her so much!

Hey I’m gonna be on a real trip till the 9th of November!   So we will have some posts by Guests.  And if I can I’ll write up a quick one from the beach in Florida.

Happy Halloween!

Ciao

Welcome to Oscar’s Tavern!

It’s just another Momo Friday.  I like that, it works.   I’ll have to reach out to Momo Fali and ask what her favorite drink is and make that a special.

Meanwhile, I’m back from Puerto Rico.  On my flight out I could see the fire that occurred last night.  We looked out of the plane window and could see the huge blaze that was unfolding.  It was kinda creepy.  They say that no one was seriously injured.

Well today’s special is ballpark style hotdogs and Budweiser!  In celebration of the MLB Playoffs!  We here at the Tavern are Yankee fans.  We’re sure we’ll beat the Angels and meet up with the Phillies.   The Angels definately a tougher team than the Dodgers. We wanted to see us vs. the Dodgers. A meeting between the present and past managers.  We still Love Joe Torre.

But, we’ll entertain Philly.  Let them have thier fun. And I don’t want to hear any of this “Buying a ball team”, or “Buying a game”.  We couldn’t “buy” a series last year could we?  We have a huge fan base.  We out sell every venue for baseball, our seats are more than 80% full EVERY GAME.  So money must come from somewhere… Oh and we have fans all over the world.  THEY buy caps, jackets, trinkets, etc.  So if we have money, it’s because we have a lot of fans.  So if we CAN buy a good pitcher, why not?   And tell your player we lure to stay? .  Get your fans to fill the park even when they’re on a losing streak.  We’re full time fans. Not “Fair weather fans”.

And we don’t burn Philly caps in the street….LOL   (ok, “The Girl” and I have a wager)… or Angel caps to that matter. We just win. 

       GO YANKEES!

Well if you’re a Phillies, or Angels fan, or any other team, we’ll still have you in the Tavern.  After all , its ” just a game”

We’ll talk football soon.

Well have a great weekend!    Thanks for stopping by!

Ciao

Welcome to Oscar’s Tavern!

It’s a ho hum Friday here at the ol’ place.   The rain is just coming down and making the place gloomy…

My mind is somewhere else today.    It’s after lunch, just before happy hour(s).  Yeah, what’s that. There’s never a “Happy Hour”. 

I’m tired…  I let Charlene go early today.  Willy is here, we’re just watching the TV and Bull$#itting…  I’m jonesing for my sweetie real bad.  Must be my time o’ the month…  LOL.

Some  girls here were talking about Halloween and what costumes they may wear this year.  All I  want to know where they are Trick or treating, or partying this year.  One is dressing up in a slinky green leotard and frilly undies, wearing a turtle shell. Going as a Ninja Turtle. Another one is gong as an old “Flapper girl”.   And another one is dressing up as a Hooters Girl.   Yikes…What ever happened to Cinderella and Batman?

A woman arrived at a party and while scanning the guests, spotted an attractive man standing alone. She approached him, smiled and said, “Hello. My name is Carmen.”

“That’s a beautiful name,” he replied. “Is it a family name?”

“No,” she replied. “As a matter of fact I gave it to myself. It represents the things that I enjoy the most – cars and men. Therefore, I chose Carmen. What’s your name?”

He answered “B.J. Titsengolf.”

 Hey, don’t read that to the kids!!!!!  It’s just me….LOL

Boy, all these pictures of ladies makes this post look like it was done by “The Girl“, who I met yesterday. I was in town and we spent lunch together. She’s a sweetheart.  We had a nice conversation.  Agreed we’d do it again. Thanks Honey!!! I had fun!

Oh, the Title?  I just finished reading Momo Fali, and it just worked.  LOL

Well I’m beat. Leo’s coming in for the night shift.  Gonna go home unwind, get cozy, open a few and watch the game.

Have a great Weekend!

Ciao!

Welcome To Oscar’s Tavern!

Hi!   It’s me!  Oscar!  Remember?  The folically challenged owner of this fine establishment!  Whew! It’s good to be home for a bit. Travel has been relentless!  I was supposed to be in Puerto Rico this week, but that got cancelled.  Maybe next week.  Either there or Kentucky.  We’ll know by tomorrow.

Well my dear friend who I’ve missed. The Lovely Charlene tells me we’re having Philly Cheese Steaks today!  Is this in honor of the Phillies? Hmmm, perhaps The Girl had some influence here…  Well to wash that down we have Michelob Ultra’s and Miler Lite for our drinks of the day!

Wow, these past two weeks have flown by!   Traveling here and there.  Had a great time in Chicago and Minneapolis.  Lots of business! 

I’ve kinda neglected the Tavern lately and want to apologize to Charlene, Willy and the crew.  But all of this will benefit us in the long run.  These “benchmarking Tavern Tours” are really business meetings.  I’ll try to put more focus on the ol’ Place.

Lisa is here today. She’s talking to a new regular, Grace.  Grace loves Miller Lite.  She’ll be happy today.  Kim was here earlier, looking as adorable as ever.  Little Eric was happy to see me come back. He did one hell of a job filling in. LOL   A lot of people are asking what is the relationship with Eric….   Hmmm.

I squeezed in a trip to Washington DC.  Actually Alexandria, Va.  My nephew’s baby was being Christened.  It was nice.  Did some sight seeing on Saturday.  In all of the years I’ve lived less than 4 hours from DC, I’ve never visited it.  Thats’ awful!!   Well I got to this time. Its very nice.  I went to Arlington Cemetary.  I witnessed the changing of the guard at the tomb of the unknown soldier.  Very Impressive and touching. You should see for yourself! I saw the Lincoln memorial, the Washington Monument… it was all fun.

Well, I have to get some bills paid and some beer ordered!   Thanks for stopping by!

What will you have?

Ciao!

Welcome to Oscar’s Tavern!

Willy here.  Oscar is still in the Mid-West.  He’s a damned traveling fool!   He started in Chicago and is now in the Twin Cities, Minneapolis and Saint Paul. 

Specials today are Miller Lite and Chicago Style Pizza!   A request from Oscar.  Why it had to be today with him not here is beyond me.  He said he ran into a suprise in Chicago.  Guess we’ll have to find out what that means. usually a female.  LOL   >tsk< >tsk< >tsk<

He called me from the road in Wisconsin.  Said he needs to come back there and visit.  Said a lot of people were not happy with the Green Bay/Vikings game. Especially given the Brett Farvre change.   Said people were almost violent! and speaking of sports, he was at a resturant/bar called Axels’s in Woodbury, MN. last night. Watched the Yankees beat the Twins.  Said he couldn’t cheer!   LOL

He’s all excited. He’s meeting a friend today.  Said he has to bring his A game.  That means he’ll shower twice.  LOL

Two boys are playing hockey on a pond in Grant Park when one is suddenly attacked by a rabid rottweiler.

 Thinking quickly, the other boy takes his stick and shoves it under the dogs collar, twists it breaking the dog’s neck and saving his friend.

A reporter who was strolling by sees the incident. “Hawks Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal,” he starts writing in his notebook.

“But I’m not a Hawks fan,” the little hero replied.

“Sorry, since we are in Chicago I just assumed you were,” said the reporter and he starts writing again. “Bears Fan Rescues Friend From Horrific Attack.”

“I’m not an Bears fan either,” the boy said.

“Oh, I assumed everyone in Chicago was either for the Bears or the Black Hawks. What team do you root for?” the reporter asked.

“I’m from San Fransisco, I’m a 49er’s fan,” the child said.

The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes, “Little Bastard From San Fransisco Kills beloved family pet”.

Well with Oscar wandering the Mid-West, that keeps me busy.  Right Charlene?

Thaaaaats Right…   Get your a$$ back here O.

Thanks for reading!

Ciao!